Can Chemistry Grow Over Time In A Relationship? - How To Win a Man's Heart

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May 11, 2015

Can Chemistry Grow Over Time In A Relationship?

In this clip, Evan Marc Katz discusses the importance of Chemistry in a relationship.

If, after your first date with Joe Cool down the street, you find yourself underwhelmed by the lack of chemical attraction between you, should you go on another date? Can chemistry improve over time?

Rate Your Date

While sexual chemistry cannot make a relationship, it can certainly be a powerful influence on your dealings with any other human being. When you go out with somebody and you find yourself completely unimpressed with the level of physical attraction, it’s probably a good idea to save yourself and your date the trouble and misguided hope that there might be a future for you.

If you rate your date a two on a scale of one to ten, you should probably cut your losses.

If, on the other hand, you think there is a spark of excitement that might be kindled…say a six on that same scale…it might be worthwhile to get to know this person better.

Chemistry Goes Beyond the Superficial

You may imagine that your date was awkward because he was shy, or she was nervous. Know, though, that real chemistry has a way of overcoming such obstacles. Real, powerful chemistry cuts immediately to the chase. If it’s not there, you cannot manufacture it. If there is a spark, though, you need to give it a chance to grow. As you enjoy other dates and become more comfortable with each other, that spark may explode into flame.

Lovers Do Improve With Time

When you see older couples whose attraction is still obvious after years of being together, you may think that chemistry becomes deeper over time. However, you’d be wrong. It is the intimacy that grows with time, not the chemistry. If the chemistry is there and it has time to work its magic, couples become more intimately familiar with what pleases and excites the other. It might be said that these couples learn to “dance together” as time passes. It is the experience with and understanding of  the little signals and innuendoes your partner sends you that keeps the passion alive, but the chemistry doesn’t change.

If there is not chemistry between you and your date, don’t belabor it. Chemistry either happens or it doesn’t. You cannot work to create it, so save your time and energy. Find somebody whose spark lights your own and concentrate him.

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