How To Get Him To Commit - How To Win a Man's Heart

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July 7, 2015

How To Get Him To Commit

You really like him and would give anything to have him take things to the next level. The next level could be making you his official girlfriend or it could be moving in together. But there are some techniques that you can use, to make sure that he is chomping at the bit to make you HIS.

Don’t give him girlfriend privileges if you are not his official girlfriend

If you are not sure how he feels about you but are sleeping with him then you need to back off a bit. A man will not buy the cow when you are giving the milk away for free – a great old saying but oh so true! Where is the incentive for him to give you more, when what he gets in return is not going to be upgraded? Keep yourself unavailable until he has made you his official girlfriend if you want to stand at chance at becoming that. Same goes for living with him. You cannot expect to get a ring on your finger if you are already living together, sharing a bed, cooking and cleaning for him. Hold back and make him work for the good stuff.

Don’t expect too much. Take the pressure off

If you pressure your man to commit to you you will most likely send him running in the opposite direction. Men do not like to be told what to do, they much prefer to come to their own conclusion in their own time and on their own terms. Stop dropping hints about taking things up a notch and spend more time doing your own thing. Let him miss you and chase after you. If he feels you are a woman in demand, then he is going to want to ‘lock you down’ before someone else does so get yourself out and about, live your life. Do not just sit about waiting on him

Make a commitment to yourself first

Spend some time on nurturing yourself. Take a step back, do more of your own thing, and your man will sense this. He will be reminded of what he has, because your energy will be lifted, and you will not be focusing solely on him (which makes a guy feel like a trapped animal). Make dates with yourself, remind yourself of your commitment to YOU. You do not NEED a man to make you feel secure. Be secure in yourself and then anything that happens around that, with a man, will complement what you already have going on.

Make it clear that you have your own plans and are not on the table forever

This is different to issuing ultimatums. But make it clear that you are a woman in demand and that lots of other people are interested in spending time with you. Be socially active, don’t sit around moping or waiting on his call to make you happy. Live your own life, and be the social butterfly that you were born to be. Fill your calendar up and he will soon realise that he cannot just leave things to the last minute in regards to fixing a date with you. Make him have to put some thought into planning things, and then he will not only fight for your time, he will value it more. Also, do not be afraid to state that you have plans with your life on a bigger scale and if he wants you then he better snap you up before somebody else does.

Give things an expiration date and stick to it

You don’t have to tell HIM this but set an expiration date in your own mind and stick to it. For example, if he does not suggest making me his official girlfriend by month three then I am leaving and finding something and someone better. Once you set your line in the sand, you are valuing your own self worth, and telling the Universe what you want to happen. If he does not meet your needs then why should you settle for being second best? You can walk away or you can then choose whether or not to give him an indication that you would like more of a commitment from him

Make him think that it was HIS idea

Be a little bit of a challenge. You don’t have to handle this in an aggressive way. Be playful. Tell him that you don’t think he can handle a woman like you. If he asks what you mean, tell him that you are looking for a real man who can make a woman feel special, and does not need to chase multiple women because he is secure in himself. By letting a man know that there is a goal to be met, if he likes you, he will want to rise to the challenge. This also demonstrated a level of self confidence. You are not begging or pleading him to commit to you. You are showing that you have standards, needs to be met, are a catch and want a man who can rise to the challenge. Watch him chase you and then let him think it was all his idea.

Be a girl that he wants to be around and give him his freedom

You want commitment but in order to get this, you first have to set him free a little and allow him to feel his freedom. Men need more space than women and need time to adjust to settling down with a woman. Let him ease himself into the relationship and when he does spend time with you, be the girl he loves to spend time with. Make it fun, quit whining and he will soon miss you when you are not around.