Why Being Too Compliant and Comfortable in Your Relationship Will Kill Your Chances of Getting Commitment From Him - How To Win a Man's Heart

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December 6, 2015

Why Being Too Compliant and Comfortable in Your Relationship Will Kill Your Chances of Getting Commitment From Him

In this video, dating coach and relationship expert Matthew Hussey explains that you may only be in a causal relationship because you are complaint to his desires. Sometimes you have to withdraw yourself in order to find true commitment.

You’re Ready to Commit but He Isn’t

You’ve been seeing someone for a number of months. You are ready for a deeper commitment but he isn’t ready. This can be a confusing and often painful situation. Should you cut him out of your life or should you stay, hoping he may change his mind?

The Danger in Being Complaint

The danger in seeing someone once or twice a week is that it gives you just enough contact to keep you from seeking out something better. Instead of being fulfilled, satisfied, or happy with this contact, you just become compliant. Chances are he knows what your compliancy level is and he is giving you just enough so you don’t move on to greener pastures.

If you want to move forward, you need to evaluate what your standard is on compliancy. If you feel you need more commitment, you need to raise your standard so that seeing someone only once or twice a week causes you to hunger for something better. This hunger will help you get over the fear of the unknown and the fears of the “what it’s,” and help you start to put yourself out there to find the person who is right for you.

Withdraw Yourself

If you truly would like to get out there and meet new people, you need to communicate this need to him. It is best to tell him that you value him as a friend and you think he is fun, but because he doesn’t want to commit to you, you need to withdraw the physical aspect of your relationship. Explain to him that you need to be fair to yourself and the future person you meet. Likely communicating this standard honestly, without drama, is going to raise your value in his eyes. Whether he ends up deciding to commit or not, you are in a win-win situation.

By distancing yourself from him you allow yourself to go out and meet the person who is right for you. You are taking the first step in allowing yourself to lead a happy, fulfilling life.

About Matthew Hussey

Matthew Hussey, speaker and New York Times Bestselling author, serves as a matchmaker on “Ready for Love,” NBC’s innovative and dramatic new relationship show about making real connections.

Through his online programs, viral internet broadcasts, sell-out seminars, NYT Bestselling book, and his roster of private clients, he has been able to pass on his insights and strategies to countless people. 50,000 women have attended his live events and he has reached over 10 million online. Hussey is the new international guru of the dating and relationship-coaching scene.

To know more about Matthew Hussey, visit his website below.